The Princess Party

So, seriously, will this birthday ever end??? It started with a lovely weekend with my parents - - birthday dinner with Mom, Daddy, Mike and Shelly…. Ham, roasted potatoes, green salad, asparagus, and rolls. And of course, Mom’s incredibly yummy pineapple upside down cake…

Then to the Melting Pot for seriously yummy delishousness of shrimp, scallops, and salmon… a cheese fondue to die for, and one of the best Caesar salads I’ve ever wrapped my lips around…

Then on to last night with some of the best Mexican food I have had in quite a long time. It was followed by a Princess Party - please don’t confuse this or me with a Party Princess. It was just a Princess Party…. Please see photos. This will explain a lot.

Divas...yes....we are all diva princesses...

Through the midst of it all, Brandon remained fairly ambivalent.

Jake was just glad to be there with his Princess crown on.

Maycie and Kayla helped with the unwrapping part.

A good time was had by all, and I am seriously ready to put this birthday to bed. Can someone fetch my scepter and cape?

Muah!

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Momma Needs a New Pair of Shoes

Anyone who knows me knows I love shoes. Shoes, shoes, shoes. Pumps, flip flops, boots, mules, sandals, clogs, tennis shoes, sling backs, dress shoes, pant shoes, hiking boots….I have them all and at least a few pairs of each…okay, more than a few pairs of each. Did I say I love shoes?

Well just yesterday I got these darling little numbers in the mail… How cute are they?

It isn’t as if I really need a new pair of Frye Veronica Slouch boots. But okay, I really needed a new pair of Veronicas. I did. I swear I did. Ask my Mom, she’ll tell you.

The application for these are just endless. You’ve got your denim skirt, your skinny jeans, your kaki skirt… good grief, I could go on and on. See, I told you.... look how cute they are!

Truth be told, I needed these like a hole in the head, but I love them anyway!

Birthdays.....Aaack

I’m really not much of a birthday person and almost always approach January 31st as I would any other day. And this "no big deal" attitude toward my birthday has really started since I turned 40, because let’s face it, it’s not as if my life is really going to change for the day - - It is not as if I can just lie around and eat Ben & Jerry’s Brownie Batter ice cream and celebrate the fact that I’m one year closer to qualifying for Medicare.

Perhaps contemplating, on the 10th anniversary of my 39th birthday, things like…. how long will it be before I’m required to cut my hair short and have it fixed at the beauty shop once a week? And when will I be too old to call my kids and sing silly songs with them, or walk like an Egyptian? When will I finally feel like the adult my age suggests I should be? Because most of the time, I feel pretty dang immature for my age.

Fortunately, I have my physical body to remind me of what my mind hasn’t yet accepted. For example, I find I can no longer wear the fitted, light-colored t-shirts and snug ribbed turtlenecks I used to wear with equally snug jeans without also wearing a vest or jacket to hide the Michelin demon residing around my midsection.

I was pleasantly surprised to have these show up at my office…thanks K! I guess the 10th anniversary ain’t so bad.




Because after next year, in the profound words of Raymond Ned, “It’ll all be over but the cryin”.



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Loved

Call it a personality flaw. Call it a quirk. Call it whatever you want to call it, but I have this difficulty, this situation. I really have a difficult time letting someone take care of me. For so many years I have been incredibly independent~I've had to be. I have only allowed but a very few people into my life and have rarely let down my walls of protection. Don’t mind so much the walls, but seriously be careful where you step ~ watch for all those land mines that I carefully laid to protect myself.

There are two people who know nothing of walls and land mines. When they look at me they see a young little barefoot girl chasing in the backyard. They see a young lady, full of promise going to the prom with Robert. They see their daughter… their cute little blonde baby girl (yes, I used to be blonde) and they love me. They don’t see damaged goods. They don’t see a single mother who used to struggle. They see me ~ right to my soul they see me. And they unabashedly love me. My mom makes my coffee with just the right amount of sugar and half and half. My dad listens intently as I tell boring stories of work. They are the two people in my life who I let take care of me.

I love you so much Mom and Daddy ~ thank you for taking care of me. Thank you for loving me despite my incredible flaws. Thank you for my beautiful sunshine daisy and wanting to buy it for me because it looked like "happy". Thank you for always wanting the best for me and for constantly praying for me. Thank you for believing in me.

Muah!

Missing You

There are so many times during my day, week, month and year that I miss you so deeply that it encapsulates me. I wish sometimes that I could just twitch my nose and I would be sitting on the couch next to you in your living room in Newhall. I find myself daydreaming of you, mom, my daughters, granddaughters and me baking cookies in your kitchen and you pretending to look away while Maycie Jean sneaks a taste of cookie dough. My soul aches for you to know my girls and my grandbabies.

I recently read something that reminded me of how I feel, it went something like this:

Even though the feeling and sound in my heart gets softer, it becomes like the train that whistles in the distance a few times a day that is just always there but not so loud that you notice it daily or even weekly. It is just there until the moment when you are dancing in the kitchen as Neil Diamond sings, "she got the way to move me, cherry" and then the playlist suddenly ends and it seems so very quiet until you hear that train call from miles away and you find yourself paying attention again. It catches you. And then you notice it each time for a while after that.

I hear the train whistling and my heart aches with missing you. It is painful right to the middle of my chest. I know how lucky I was to know you, to call you my grandma and my friend. Today it overwhelms me. Today I can close my eyes and dream that I am in that beautiful Newhall house where love abounded, where there was always a yummy smell from the kitchen, and where my soul was fed. But when I open my eyes, it is just me here in my living room, missing you terribly and the distant sound of the train’s whistle.

I miss you my precious grandma…

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Fire in the Sky

Last night the sunset was monumental. Besides happening at a very poignant moment, the colors radiated throughout the evening sky. It is so amazing to me the color that is thrown from the reflection off the Great Salt Lake.

It was truly a moment ~

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Thanksgiving turns to Christmas OVERNIGHT

Okay, so first of all, I think it is time to take this down.

Second, can I just say “huh???”

First this… (yes, I am wearing sweat pants...no comment please)

Then this….

And then this…. I left my gloves out in the garage so I didn't track the snow in everywhere. I went out the next morning and they were frozen solid.

Holy Snow, Batman!

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